Tag Archives: transition

Are you committing emotional and spiritual suicide?

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Recently, whilst I read this post, I read and re-read the following:

The only thing standing between you and your dreams is the excuses and sacrifices you keep making. You’re comfortable and I get that. I am too. But this state of comfort is suicide season for anyone who dreams of becoming something more… Commit emotional suicide, or step outside your comfort zone and follow your dreams. The choice is yours.

It is that little step, that leap of faith, that choice to trust in the not known and doing it; stepping, leaping, choosing… and leaving the what is known and crippling behind in one decisive movement forwards.

Personally, I have years of not trusting, not leaping and not choosing. Has it been Hell? Yes! And I wouldn’t wish it on another.

Our natural state is innocent, curious and untainted by the confusions that so soon arrive in our little worlds BUT, we don’t have to either accept or agree with these confusion-causing factors. We are creatives, we have capacity to shift and become so much more than the suicides of believing that these confusions, pains and emotional and spiritual traumas have any power or control over us and our life choices.

How do we transition from our natural magic into fearing, fearful folk unsure of our capacities, skills and qualities? We copy what we witness and take as true when given by our families, our friends, our other life influencers and make them ours. BUT, we can transition back out from these challenges.

Our past is only real in our minds, our memories, in our stories we tell our selves. One thing for sure is that our pasts are over, gone, past and dead; unless we choose to resurrect them and make them into ghosts and ghouls that haunt and confuse and inhibit us in today’s world. We get to choose.

And, we get to choose how we live with the (dis-)comfort zones these life-affecting factors bring to us… a comfort zone is a place that holds us in where we think we are safe with that level of (known) safety or pain. Anything that’s further than these criteria, we think is unsafe, dangerous or may even kill us. That is often merely an illusion. And, I am living proof that having my discomfort zones challenged, broken and shattered, that I am in fact far more well than I have ever been in my life.

I’ve chosen to challenge my “suicide season” and move from fears that long-held me in my pains: what do you choose?

This is not meant to challenge – well, it is but only gently – it’s meant to get you out and exploring the extra possibilities you life has to offer when you’re not hiding (for comfort) from what’s richly available and waiting for you to discover… Go on: SHARE! Write your thoughts and comments below…

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We are all baby ducks…

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I’m reading an interesting e-book at the moment called Living from the Heart – currently only the first chapter called: We are all baby ducks – the title of which intrigued me and my creative juices got into flow…

In essence, like baby ducks – ducklings to be pedantic – we, as humans learn to bond onto other people, thoughts, situations, ideas, concepts, emotions, beliefs and ways of being. And whilst these bonds can prove useful and occasionally helpful, they (can) inhibit our natural ability to be true to our selves.

In bonding to something I’ve learned outside of my self – something I’ve been told or a thought that’s arrived in my thinking, an event in my life or the way someone else behaves, thinks or treats me – I am already narrowing my world to a place of no other possibilities and possibly self-destruction.

And, that, my friends, is dangerous! We are remarkable and beautifully created and creative beings with oodles of untapped potentials. Why, oh, why do we need to be pigeonholed or entombed in a box of our own construction by buying into bonds that destroy our very abilities to manifest the amazing?

So, perhaps this is a call to action: find what bonds you hold that simply limit, even hamstring your talents, your wonder or your Beauty, and release them. Then watch your self soar in the space you will find as a result. That space is yours to take and be in; it is your natural state.

Transitions take many forms – some are drastic in the painful sense; others momentous in an ecstatic spiritual sense; some are just plain small and seemingly insignificant, though they do trundle us forwards towards the next set of choices where we have options to make new decisions.

Are you ready to make different decisions and to move towards your natural grace of Being Love, free of bonds that harm you?

Perhaps it’s time to move from your current state … what do you think?

The Moment Everything Changes…

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There are several constants in Life: death is one, thinking another, taxes a third. A fourth one seldom acknowledged is the constant of change. Here are some thoughts about change and the effects change brings…

* Each and every moment is a time of changes; some are so minimal, we don’t notice their shift; others can be more dramatic – in either a pleasing way or a way that destroys our world experience.

* The bottom line is that change happens all the time – some might call it entropy – but, whatever we call this “IT”, its influence in our life is often (and easily) ignored.

* Many elderly people I’ve worked with have all say the same two things: they never thought they’d be this old and how fast time has passed. Time changed them, they got older (too quickly). They aged moment by moment until one moment they reaslised they were old(er).

* A recent series of BBC 3 programs was about how people’s lives radically changed due to illness or trauma. One was about traumatic brain injuries, another about being disabled in an instant. Each taught me valuable lessons about how people, fellow human beings, are affected by life traumas and how they choose to deal with them.

* One thing that empowers us to deal with change is our innate resilience, the ability we have to manage and cope – how we choose to be affected by what’s happened and what we’ll do about. Another thing we have is the power of choice, the ability to decide how we want the events that have occurred to affect our lives.

Changes transition our life experiences and challenge how we’ll deal with the “what next(s)” we face as a result. And here’s where the beauty, the power, the magic of the human choice to do something remarkable, happens. We can do nothing about the past, it is already gone, some say dead; what nexts are the now, the future and they remain within our power to choose what we’ll do with them.

Sometimes, getting to a place where we can make choices to deal with what’s happened takes a little time, Love, exploration and the opportunity to share and in a supportive environment of listening. A kind compassionate, understanding ear can prove an incredibly powerful way to re-evaluate what’s happened and how to deal with it.

Anyone have any thoughts, feelings or comments on this? If so, please feel free to share…

So, what does a Transitions Mentor do?

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Hello All,

Here is a testimonial that shares the experiences of one of my clients. Francesca had been going through personal hell due to changes and difficulties at her work as her employers constantly changed her working situation. As it describes my working style, much better than I can, I thought I’d share it with you…

Testimonial for Benn

“I have known Benn for quite a few years now, and the recent journey undertaken with him as mentor was a new venture for us, and yet a confirmation of what I already knew about him.

It is going to be difficult to select what is relevant – Benn has wit, knowledge, emotional intelligence and empathy, and all of Benn’s being, life experience, values is shared when he becomes your mentor. Generosity is a key quality. And his generosity, in turn , is the offspring of Love – the driving force which I believe must have guided Benn towards choosing this role: what else can be the motivation for lending a hand to those in despair and helping them remove bleakness layer by layer, until the purity of one’s soul can shine again. And what better reason can there be for choosing a mentor, if not knowing that he loves you already; he will not be distracted and corrupted in his Love by the darkness that envelopes you: like a parent, he will keep his eye and his heart on the Good of your soul, and he will help you embrace your true self, and never let go.”

    Francesca 29 June 2011

Blessings,

Benn